The Wilder, The More Beautiful...

This is a corner in the garden that I no longer tend. In here is a magnolia tree, a row of viburnum that I had intended to keep clipped as a hedge, a philadelphus (mock orange blossom), an old rugosa hedge rose and, in the foreground, the deliciously-scented rose, Gertrude Jeykell.

They have been unpruned for about three years. They are all crowding each other out, all jostling for space. The roses and philadelphus arch their canes higher and higher, reaching for the light they want. Their arms cross over so that every inch seems to hold a part of every plant. It’s a thicket, and the birds love its safety. There is an empty nest at head height in the virburnum, the birds all fledged and left. It is thick with bees, littered with fallen magnolia petals. The philadelphus flowers have a rich tropical scent and at night it spreads through the garden like syrup.

This is my favourite type of garden. This is what I remember gardens being as a child. Tall, tangled and dazzlingly alive.

Yes, there are weeds. Sure, I’d get more roses if I pruned devotedly. Possibly some plants might prefer more space, but they find it on their own anyway—by going upward. Letting go of the garden means you lose the sense of order and neatness that many of us long for. Also lost is the control you feel when you shape something (anything) to your specification. In the garden, as in life.

But what you experience instead is the fizzing aliveness of plants and animals, curiosity at how things naturally unfold, and magical combinations that we could never imagine nor contrive. Mostly, and most importantly, it alters the balance of belonging. We’re no longer master. We’re not dominant. We exist together. Multiples of lives of all kinds, each of us doing what we do, alongside each other.

There is nothing wrong with the messy. We can choose not to conform, or force the conformity of others. We can get tangled up and intertwined and lose touch with where one ends and another begins. There can be weeds. It can be beautiful. We can relax.

Mary xx